Loving Presence: The Inseparability of Wisdom and Compassion
Wisdom and compassion are often taught as though they were completely different aspects of the path. On the one hand, mindfulness and samadhi, governed by wise effort, lead to seeing clearly into the essential nature of things. On the other hand, the Brahma Viharas support the citta (heart) to open to and care for the vast range of human experience. This dualistic interpretation can lead to an impression that these two aspects of the path are separate from one another. Nothing could be further from the truth.
When we are engaged in mindfulness practice and come into contact with unpleasant experiences of body and heart, our animal nature shrinks away as aversion arises. Essentially, there is a “no” in the heart in relation to that unpleasant experience. Through a combination of intention, embodied presence, and some degree of wise view, we learn to open to such experiences. We acknowledge their presence, allow the heart to be touched, and become intimate with what’s arising. We learn to transform the “no” in the heart to a “yes.”
This transformation is love, because love’s essence is to not shut anything out. The sun shines on the earth without picking and choosing what/who will receive its radiance and warmth. In a moment when we relax the barriers to what we’re willing to experience, we become that radiant warmth. This is not just theory; it is a very palpable and distinct experience.
When we are engaged in the Brahma Vihara practices (loving-kindness, compassion, appreciative joy, equanimity), we vacillate between being connected to the particular aspect of the heart we are cultivating and experiencing what blocks the heart's ability to be warm, caring, and open. As we settle into our formal meditation practice and allow these vicissitudes of the heart to come and go, we see that they arise due to causes and conditions–some known and some not.
What becomes clear, though, is that we are not in control of how the heart unfolds. We have agency, yes, but not control. This is an important understanding of the three characteristics of change, dukkha, and not-self. We see the seasons of the heart ceaselessly changing as it opens and closes. We feel the unreliability of dukkha since we can’t insist on the heart being open whenever we want it to be. Most importantly, we begin to experience the openings and closings of the heart as a process that is happening due to changing conditions without referring back to anything lasting and permanent.
The above are just two of many examples of how the wisdom and compassion aspects of the path are embedded in each other. Furthermore, I would argue that they actually need each other to fully flourish. The arising of wisdom with a heart that is not fully engaged will not be complete or as integrated into the fullness of the citta. The heart that opens to the vicissitudes of life without the accompaniment of wise view is liable to become reactive in one way or another. Equanimity is the heart that is open to both the joys and sorrows of the world and knows things are just as they are.
I would suggest further that any language that differentiates wisdom from the heart is misleading. We communicate in concepts, which by definition misses the mark.
These two aspects of the path are simply two sides of the same coin. Loving presence or present love–it’s all the same. It can be helpful to know ourselves and the habit patterns of our heart so as to realize where to lean into. The reason I choose to use the term “loving presence” for this article is that, as far as I can tell, in our hyper-intellectual society, most people could benefit from leaning into the love side of the equation. Although, we actually can’t help but cultivate both, even when we are leaning into one aspect or the other.